March 2005                                                            The Megaphone                                                                       Page 3

Family

I was born to my parents,
My children born to me,
In the world of Daniel Webster
That is defined as family.

If I can't see my siblings,
And my children are busy too,
I can truly appreciate,
Family composed of friends like you.

All of you are family,
For me you're always there.
You uphold and encourage me,
Happy moments you also share.

Therefore Mr. Webster,
I am sorry to declare,
Your definition of family
Is narrow by compare.

written by - 

Cindy (Benedict) Odom '69

A New Wal-Mart Store

submitted by Gertha Cabbage

A Wal-Mart store that sells husbands has just opened in Dallas, Texas, where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

            
There are only 6 floors. It states that the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor, you may choose any man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

    
So, a woman goes to the Wal-Mart Husband Store to find a husband.

              
On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping Wal-Mart's Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building - and have a nice day!